Chapter 45

'She has disturbed me, without pity'

01 The evening after the funeral, my young lady and I were seated in the library. Cathy had told me of how she had at last persuaded Linton to help her to escape. We had just agreed that the best thing that could happen to her, would be to have permission to go on living at the Grange, at least during Linton's lifetime, he being allowed to join her there, and I to remain as housekeeper, when one of the dismissed servants who had not yet left, rushed in to say that Heathcliff was coming through the yard.

02 He made no ceremony of knocking, or sending in his name. He was master, and walked straight in, without saying a word.

03 It was the same room into which he had been shown, as a guest, eighteen years before. Time had changed his appearance very little. He was the same man, his dark face rather more under control, his body a little heavier, perhaps. Cathy had risen, with the idea of rushing out, when she saw him.

04 'Stop!' he said, holding her by the arm. 'No more running away! I've come to fetch you home, and I hope you'll be a dutiful daughter, and not encourage my son to further disobedience. He's suffered for that, I can tell you.'

05 'Why not let Cathy continue here,' I begged, 'and send Master Linton to her?'

06 'I'm looking for a tenant for the Grange,' he answered, 'and I want my children with me. Besides, that girl owes me her services for her food and lodging. I'm not going to keep her in idleness and rich living. Make haste and get ready.'

07 'I shall,' said Catherine. 'Linton is all I have to love in the world, and though you have done what you could to make us hate each other, you cannot succeed!'

08 'It is not I who will make him hateful to you—it is his own spirit. He's bitter about your going off, and I heard him draw a pleasant picture of what he would do to you, if he were stronger.'

09 'I know he has a bad nature,' said Cathy. 'He's your son. But I'm glad that mine is better, to forgive it. And I know that he loves me, and for that reason I love him. Mr Heathcliff, you have nobody to love you. You are miserable, aren't you?'

10 'You shall be sorry for yourself soon,' said her father-in-law, 'if you stand there another minute. Go and get your things.'

11 She scornfully went, and in her absence, I began to beg for Zillah's place at the Heights, but he would not agree. He told me to be silent, and then, for the first time, looked round the room and at the pictures.

12 Having studied the splendid painting of Mrs Linton, he said:

13 'I shall have that at home. Not because I need it, but ... ' He turned quickly to the fire, and with a strange smile, continued, 'I'll tell you what I did yesterday! I got the man who was digging Edgar Linton's grave, to remove the earth from her coffin-lid and I opened it. It is still her face, but the grave-digger said it would change if the air blew on it. He had hard work to move me, but I struck one side of the coffin loose, and covered it up: not on her husband's side, curse him!—and I paid the man to pull it away, when I'm laid there, and slide out the side of mine nearest to her too.'

14 'You were very wicked, Mr Heathcliff,' I exclaimed. 'Weren't you ashamed to disturb the dead?'

15 'I disturbed nobody, and I gave some relief to myself. Disturbed her? No! She has disturbed me, night and day, for eighteen years—without pause, without pity—till last night; and last night I was at peace. I dreamt I was sleeping the last sleep by that sleeper, with my heart stopped and my cheek frozen against hers.

16 'It began in a peculiar way, that strange feeling,' he went on. 'You know I was wild after she died, and always, day after day, praying her to return to me—her spirit. I have a strong belief in ghosts. I am certain that they can, and do exist among us! The day she was buried, there came a fall of snow. In the evening, I went to the churchyard. It was bitterly cold, and being alone, I said to myself, "I'll have her in my arms again!" I got a spade and began to dig. I had reached the coffin, and was on the point of opening it, when it seemed that I heard a sigh from someone above, close to the edge of the grave, and bending down, I thought, "If only I can get this off, I wish they may cover us both over with the earth." There was another sigh close to my ear. I appeared to feel the warm breath of it. I knew that no living thing of flesh and blood was near, but I felt with complete certainty that Cathy was there, not under me, but on the earth. A sudden sense of relief flowed through my heart, through every part of my body. I was indescribably comforted. Her presence was with me while I refilled the grave, and it led me home. You may laugh if you will, but I was sure I would see her there! The door was fastened—that fool Hindley and my wife opposed my entrance. I remember stopping to kick him, and then hurrying upstairs. I looked round impatiently—I felt her by me—I could almost see her, and yet I could not! And, since then, sometimes more and sometimes less, I've suffered from that unbearable torment! When I sat in the house, it seemed that in going out I should meet her; when on the moors, that I should meet her coming in. She must be somewhere at the Heights, I was certain! And when I slept in her room, the moment I closed my eyes, she was either outside the window, or entering the room, or even resting her precious head on the same pillow as she did as a child. I opened my eyes a hundred times a night—always to be disappointed! Now, since I've seen her, I'm at peace—a little. It was a strange way of killing, slowly, with the ghost of a hope, through eighteen years!'

17 Mr Heathcliff paused, and wiped his forehead. His eyes were fixed on the fire, his forehead not drawn down as usual, but raised, lessening the fierceness of his expression, but giving him a peculiarly troubled look, He only half addressed me, and I kept silent. After a short period, he looked once again at the picture, took it down, and leant it against the sofa.

18 As he was doing so, Cathy entered, announcing that she was ready, when her pony should be saddled,

19 'Send the picture over tomorrow,' said Heathcliff to me. Then, turning to her, he added, 'You may do without your pony. Your own feet will serve you. Come along.'

20 'Goodbye, Ellen,' whispered my dear little mistress. 'Come and see me.'

21 'Take care you do no such thing,' said her new father.

22 And, fixing Cathy's arm under his own, he hurried her away.